Sunday, October 02, 2005

On the couch this Sunday...

I got 14 hours of sleep last night.

My husband is gone this weekend. He’s hanging out with some friends in the Berkshires, and I have a lousy cold, so I’m home. He wasn’t going to go, but I reminded him of when he was desperately ill and I went to see these same people. I had great food, good times, and got to relax. I needed that and so does he. Plus, it’s a cold.

My husband is having a really good time. He called around five. He told me he had decided to stay a second night, if that was okay. I was really glad, actually. Not like I don’t want him around, I have a happy mental image of him sitting on Colin and Emma’s couch staying up late, and the three of them laughing until their sides hurt.

I was also glad as it gave me a chance to get some cleaning up done around the house. I am feeling better than I have in a few days (14 hours of sleep can do that to you). I started thinking.

I started thinking about how nice it would be for Husband to come home to fresh laundry and a sink no longer full of dirty dishes. I always try to do this when I’m home and he has a long day of work. When he gets home, I like the house to be clean and for myself to be dressed in non-grungy clothes and smelling nice.

Not very feminist is it?

Kind of June Cleaverish, huh?

That got me thinking about lots of things. I work to look nice for my husband. Not hard...I mean, I rarely wear make up, I don’t spend a ton of time exercising, and never in a million years would I consider getting cosmetic surgery.

I do, however, like to look nice for my husband.

It’s not that I am insecure. I know there are women who feel that they have to look good for their men or they will find someone more physically attractive. No, it’s nothing like that. I actually have more self-esteem than most women I know. I am not hot, but I am aware that I am cute. I don’t cause heads to turn or anything, but I do get interested smiles from guys at coffee shops (not so much now that I am obviously pregnant).

I think of it as being the same as when he wears that blue shirt I like. Damn, he looks hot in that shirt.

I see many women who are married, have kids, and obviously don’t make any attempt to look nice. I mean, no one expects a working mom (and all moms are working moms, job outside the home or not) to look like a supermodel or anything, but these are women who have nice bone structure, figures that look like they have given birth a few times, but so what? Lots of women have crows feet, stretch marks, wide hips, and sagging breasts but they’re still women and they’re still beautiful. If they tried, they could really look it.

I also notice that these women looks kind of sad when I see them at the store, as opposed to the other women who are dressed cute. Women who come in with their diaper bags and screaming kids, but look like they’ve had a nice haircut recently and go for a power walk every now and then.

I remember when I was in high school and my parents became new parents again. My mom had a career, and a tremendously active baby, but she still looked nice. She dressed up for certain occasions, played golf. She didn’t throw her womanhood out of the window just because she was really busy and had kids. She didn’t take her nice looks, and her marriage to an attractive guy for granted. Neither did my Dad. He often told her how great she looked, brought flowers home for no other reason than he wanted to make her feel appreciated.

My husband does that. That’s one of the reasons I like him coming home to a clean house, and a wife wearing a tight tank top and a pair of his boxers (that’s a look he’s a fan of).

Maybe these dowdy beyond their years women don’t have husbands like mine (or like my Dad). Maybe they don’t feel attractive, so they don’t bother to play up their beauty. That sucks.

He's planning a baby shower for me. He’s making the invitations, organizing a caterer, and is planning to spend the day shuttling my friends back and forth from their cars, because the café doesn’t have very good parking.

Any wonder I want him to feel appreciated?


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