Sunday, January 16, 2005

Intimate Stranger

This is a follow-up to Selfish Anonymity, so if you haven't read that, this will make no sense (scroll down a wee bit).
I think I see the issue. He is an intimate stranger. He knows nothing about me, but, unlike Rick and Pauly, should he learn anything we'll actually have to look each other in the eye the next day. Worse still, if he gets to know anything real about me, he might start to care about me, and then things would get all weird. I might actually have to be "involved" in a "relationship".

My husband thinks I'm not giving the guy enough credit.

Here's the thing, though. Ninety nine percent of the men in my life (Dad, Husband, and Best Friend are the exceptions) have put me on some kind of pedestal. They have used their feelings for the unavailable me as an excuse not to go out and look for a healthy dating relationship OR used me to replace their absent mothers, and therefore expected me to be constantly affirming and nurturing OR indulged their own protective natures and made me their “Baby Sister”, the fragile creature they are sworn to protect from emotional and physical harm at all costs.

Or they have been observing my relationship with my husband since it began, and I am an object of pity (because of the illness). I hate that the most.

So what tells me that this guy would be different?


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