Aw, he's so cute.

WHY
THE
FRIG
ISN'T HE
COMING OUT?

Awwwww.

"Had that baby yet?"

So I am about a week overdue. We have an ultrasound tomorrow, and I will be induced a week from today, should he still not arrive on his own. I don't want to be induced, but more than that, I do not want to give birth to a fifteen pound baby.

He's moving around in there, I can feel him, but he seems to have no desire to come out.

Aaaaaargh!

Nothing against Ms. Gwen Stefani, but if I hear her song "Luxurious" one more time I am going to set fire to something. It's not a bad song, though I wouldn't say I like it. It's just that the damn chorus has line that keeps going around my brain in an infinite loop.

Working so hard every night and day
And now we get the pay back
Trying so hard saving up the paper
Now we get to lay back

overandoverandoverandoverandoverandover!

She sings it very fast and it's very catching.

At four am,

the strangest things go through your mind. I feel very Seinfeldian right now.

I think any business that would display a sign in their window reading "ATM Machine" should be shut down.

A stands for Automated
T stands for Teller
M stands for MACHINE!

So, there is an Automated Teller Machine Machine inside? A machine that spits out ATM's when you give it money?

These businesses are run by idiots. Idiots!

Grrr...

So...the money was on my son arriving on the 9th. Several people I know are out a few bucks, as it is the morning of the 15th and he is not yet here.

His official due date is tomorrow, the 16th. By lovely coincidence, this is also Sam Costello's birthday. If you read this around the date of publication, hop over to Dark But Shining and wish him a happy 29th Birthday (hee hee hee...he'll be 30 in a year).

I am digressing.

This post is going up at 6:30something in the morning because I have not been able to fall asleep yet. I have not been able to fall asleep yet because I am massively uncomfortable and no matter how exhausted I am, cannot get into any position that will allow me to rest.

I am so huge. I have gained fifty pounds since becoming pregnant. The doctor thinks that the baby is between 8 and 9 pounds. I really am not worried about weight loss after he is born. I was kind of thin to start with, so even if I only lose half of the baby weight I'll be happy. What bugs me is that this extra weight is all in one place and it is making everything so damn difficult.

Sigh.

I really want my son to get here. Not just for reasons of being able to see my feet and lie down in comfort. I just want to have him here. I've been waiting for him for so long, I want him to get out here.

I say that now. A week from now, when he's screaming at 2 am, I may want to put him back.

Oh, please GOD let him be here in a week.

Resolutions from 2005. Resolutions for 2006.

From 2005:

1. Join a gym. HA HA HA HA....didn't do that.

2. Take better care of my husband by not coddling his every whim, allowing him to do some things for himself (but still give him a verbal ass kicking if he wants to work 10 hour days), tell him when he's getting on my nerves, and not feel guilty about it. Done.

3. Have more people over/go out by myself more and not feel guilty about it. Done

4. Allow people to help me more, and not feel guilty about it. Done.

5. Eat better. Less frozen, more veggies. Mmmmaybe did it a little...

6. Send more work out to agents/publishers. I've been so busy lately, I haven't had the time, but if I don't make time, I'll be forty with a bunch of unpublished stuff (some of which is actually good) and a deep sense of regret. Did a little of that.

7. Not cry every day. Not by repressing anything, just by finding reasons to be happy. Yep!

Now for 2006...

1. Though I am having a baby, and my first priority in life is going to be being a wonderful mother to him, I do not want to forget that I am a wife, a writer, a woman, and a friend.

2. Send more stuff out to publishers.

3. Illustrate. My husband gave me wonderful tools and I am going to use them.

4. Eat better. I got a start on this, but I definitely want to kick this up a notch.

5. Every day this year, I am going to write down one thing that I love about my husband. On the next New Year's Eve, I'm
going to give them to him in a book.

6. Start a journal for my son. I think I'll go with the "one thing every day". I know some days I'll have ten things to think of, and some days I'll be too tired to think of any.

7. Buy one new book a month for my son. This will be easy.

Happy 2006!