Sunday, December 25, 2005

Merry Christmas!

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Getting All Verklempt.

My husband got me a gorgeous drafting table for Christmas, and some wonderful new professional art supplies. Pencils and Oil Pastels, my favorites to work with. This way I'll have my own space, and really good tools to work on the illustrations for my children's books.

I love him!

So my sister says to me...

"Hey Big Sister...you know how the baby could come at ANY time? What if...what if you went into LABOR at two o clock in the morning? Wouldn't that be SO FUN? That would be the latest I have ever stayed up!"

In an hour, it will be Christmas Day.

I have traveled many moonless nights,
Cold and weary with a babe inside,
And I wonder what I’ve done.
Holy father you have come,
And chosen me now to carry your son.

I am waiting in a silent prayer.
I am frightened by the load I bear.
In a world as cold as stone,
Must I walk this path alone?
Be with me now.
Be with me now.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.
Breath of heaven.

Do you wonder as you watch my face,
If a wiser one should have had my place,
But I offer all I am
For the mercy of your plan.
Help me be strong.
Help me be.
Help me.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven.



I’m having trouble sleeping,which is nothing new these days. I’ve gotten so big it’s tough to be comfortable in any position.

It never fails to astound me. Each Christmas she is in the forefront of my mind. I know it is the birthday of Jesus. God coming to Earth as one of its most helpless creatures is miraculous and awe inspiring. Yet firstly I think, on this holiday, of Mary.

I have been hearing her story every Christmas for my entire life.

Mary was about a decade younger than I am, and she was traveling on a donkey. I’m going to have a private room in a great hospital. She didn’t have the option of an epidural (I want to try it without). She didn’t even have the option of a bed. She had no books available to give her any hint as to what it would be like...not that it would have helped. It’s highly unlikely that she knew how to read.

She was poor and tired and scared and probably more uncomfortable than I can imagine. She gave birth in a barn. A smelly, drafty barn!

She is The Holy Mother to so many, many people. Yet she was just a poor kid who had to deal with nausea, stretch marks, cramps, back pain and a host of other things for nine months.

How some people can treat teenage girls with disrespect astounds me. God chose one of them to have His Son because He knew she could handle it.

Elevating an unwed teenage mother to a Holy status.

I'm getting sleepy now, so I think I'll just toss this up for people to read. I'm sure it is not my most eloquent.

Actually, before I go, I'm going to stick in the lyrics to one of my favorite Christmas Songs. It's about her.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Hmm.

I mentioned in the previous post how my family tends to produce big babies. I am worried because a lot of the adorable, soft and probably costly baby gifts I am getting are newborn sized clothes. As in for babies up to ten pounds.

I fear a lot of them may go unworn. Which would suck, because they are freaking adorable.

Also, it would mean that my son won't have that many clothes that fit him.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Another pregnancy post? Can't this woman talk about anything else?

My baby is due in four weeks and three days.

It is so strange, I feel as if I just found out, and now it's almost over. Rumor has it, though, that this last months feels like the longest.

I am so tired. Since I found out that I was pregnant, I have gained 40 pounds. That's a lot of extra weight to carry pretty much in one area of the body. I'm a little nervous about that. I know you aren't supposed to gain too much weight for heart reasons. I thought I was supposed to gain 25-30. My doctor says everything is fine, though, so I'll trust her. My mother has reminded me that our family gives birth to 9 pounders (that's the average, my cousin was 13 pounds at birth)so my big gain isn't that big a deal.

I'm very proud of the fact that I haven't looked at myself in the mirror and felt "fat", as I know other pregnant women have. I have been in awe of the sheer size of me, yes, but I have not felt fat. Just very, very, very pregnant. It is beautiful. Also exhausting.

My Beloved is starting to get a little unnerved, because he keeps running into people whose perfectly healthy babies were born three weeks early. I think he's worried it will happen to us and he won't have fixed the cradle yet.

The bottom falls out of the cradle when you put anything in it.

I'm not putting the baby in there until he fixes it.

I still need some stuff. I don't have a baby monitor yet, or a breast pump (I had no idea there were so many different kinds of pumps). I was overwhelmed in the breast pump aisle of Target. I also need nightgowns and other clothes with holes in the bosom so I don't have to strip every time I need to feed him.

I've also just found out that another two of my friends are newly pregnant.

Peer pressure, I guess.

Oh, I can't believe he'll be here soon! I can't wait to hold him and smell his head (love the smell of baby head) and hand him to his Dad when he starts kicking!

BabybabybabybabyIlovemybabybabybabybaby!

Oh. Holy. Crap.

I'm way too tired to keep typing (and it's not even 9pm, what the...?). I shall now go to bed and stop polluting the blogosphere with my drivel.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Buried in a Winter Wonderland

Wow.

Worcester is covered in a beautiful blanket of pristine white.

A pristine blanket of white that is making it impossible for people to get up our street. My husband is at the office right now because he just tried for fiteen minutes to get up our road and couldn't.

All of the plows are out and trying to keep up with the snow, but it just keeps coming.

I feel stupid for saying this, but there's a fancy Christmas party tonight that we've been invited to and I have a pretty preggo dress and I really want to go, so I really really want the snow to clear up. Obviously, I don't want to go badly enough to risk safety.